Last night we went for a family meal at a family restaurant. As we ate, we couldn’t help but notice the family seated next to us – Mum, Dad and their little boy (who they later told us was 16 months old).
They sat down at their table and – within minutes – their little boy objected to his highchair. So Mum lifted him out and set him on the floor. He then proceeded to toddle around the restaurant – and we watched on tenterhooks as waiting staff with trays loaded with food and drinks tried to avoid him.
Mum followed him around the restaurant for a good 15 minutes, within which time Dad had ordered – and eaten – his starter. Mum then sat down and Dad took over the baby-chasing for another 15 minutes. The main course arrived and we hoped that the poor parents would finally get to sit down – with their little one – and all enjoy a meal together.
But no – up Mum got once again and the baby-led restaurant tour continued throughout the rest of the meal, with the occasional stop-off at the table to try, in vain, to get their little boy to eat.
So is this how a meal with your baby at a restaurant HAS to be?
The answer to this is a big, resounding NO!
Taking your little one out for meals with you – from as early an age as possible – is one of the best things you can do to help him learn about acceptable mealtime behaviour.
It’s true, of course, that very young babies cannot be expected to sit quietly in a highchair for long periods of time. But in the early days it’s a good idea to visit family-friendly restaurants, recommended by other parents for their quick service!
We always used a highchair for our babies, rather than letting them sit on our laps (and if there’s not one available, we recommend bringing your own!). For one thing, I used to find that once I sat one of my children on my lap, he’d then want to get down to the floor. And – from a rather more selfish point of view – it’s a lot easier to eat your OWN dinner when your baby is comfortably seated.
I found it safer, too – it’s easier to keep the highchair area free of breakable glasses and sharp cutlery!
It’s also a good idea to bring along some diversions for your baby to keep him happy until the food arrives… rather than getting him out of his highchair to move around the restaurant. You’ll probably find that – once out of the highchair – he won’t want to get back in. A classic cause of restaurant tantrums!
Diversions can be anything from toys to finger foods – or you could use our trick, which was to offer mundane items from my handbag (purse) that would magically keep our little ones quiet for ages! For example, I remember our son spending over an hour putting salt sachets into my change purse, zipping it, then unzipping it and taking them all out again!
There are other benefits to keeping your baby seated throughout the meal.
We have always made a point of encouraging a real appreciation of – and interest in – good food. This appreciation has stayed with our children as they have grown – and they all genuinely look forward to eating out and sampling new flavours!
Talk to your baby about the foods he is eating and allow him to try some of yours! In other words, engage him in the meal, so that he begins to understand just what a visit to the restaurant is all about! If you take him away from the table and allow him to toddle around, it doesn’t just disrupt your meal, it also makes him far less likely to eat his own… after all, why eat if he can play?
Another important thing to bear in mind is that – once your little one is in the habit of wandering around at mealtimes – you will find the habit very hard to break!
Certainly, some parents don’t see this as a problem and do give their children the freedom to move around restaurants both during and after meals.
Yet (and this is a mother of five lively children speaking and not a childless and intolerant individual!) – this type of behaviour is just inappropriate in such a setting! It’s important that children learn to respect the comfort of other restaurant users – and it’s vital that children aren’t exposed to the hazards of hot food and drinks from the tray of the waiter they’re about to trip up!
What do YOU think about parents allowing their children to move around restaurants? Do you feel that it’s important to start teaching your little one how to sit at the table from an early age? Do you have any tips to share?
Feel free to leave your comments below!
Christina
Sunday 22nd of March 2009
My husband has always hated going to a restaurant, looking forward to a nice meal just to have to listen to a misbehaving child the whole time! Before we had our daughter he would always say..... We are NOT going to let out children behave like that! So far so good, she is only 10 months but we have followed some of the same suggestions as the OP listed and have had very enjoyable dining experiences with our little one:)
Andrea
Sunday 4th of May 2008
I think it is very important to enourage staying in the highchair from an early age. The same goes for shopping carts. The worst restaurant experince I can remember involved a little girl, probably just about 16-18 months, who was allowed to roam all over while waiting to eat. When the food came, she screamed for a good 10 minutes and threw her food all over the place. At that point, my husband and I looked at each other, and then looked at our still sleeping two month old and said "NEVER!"